The Bull Who Bruised Me

So over at Diary of a Woo Girl, I created a woo girl addendum to my 24 before 24 list that I have over here.

It goes as follows:

 

1.  Ride a mechanical bull and not fall off in two seconds.

2.  Learn to line dance.

3.  Start a trend.

4.  Bring back curly straws.

5.  Become a bar regular.

6.  Live a woo girl life on a post-grad budget.

7.  Pretend it’s my birthday so I can wear a tiara…  Get birthday drinks.

8.  Perfect pink cowboy hat wear.

9.  From the bucket list (18):  Go gambling and win.

10.  From the bucket list (19):  Be a model.

11.  From the bucket list (20):  Meet a nice guy in a bar.

 

I want to talk about the first item on the list, 22a from the 24 before 24 list.

I don’t really know what I meant by “and not fall off in two seconds.”  Was that a literal two seconds?  Because I was already able to ride a mechanical bull for more than two seconds.  I think it may have been a metaphorical two seconds.  I want to talk about two bull riding incidents I’ve had recently.  I suspect another one on Thursday…  Because bull riding is fantastic and it’s Thursday…

So the first incident occurred a week ago.  I went out with Stacey, Lilac, and the engineers (Steph was sadly studying) and we ended up at the cowboy bar as usual.  Not my cowboy bar downtown, but the cowboy bar.

You get so used to things, it’s funny how they suddenly become the only one in the world.  I know there are obviously a lot of cowboy bars, but that one at the alma mater is the cowboy bar.  It’s like if you say you want a certain food and everyone immediately drives you to it, like only OC’s serves pizza or something.

So, anyway, I convinced Stacey to ride the bull with me.  It went mostly well, except we fell off and hit heads and she got mad at me…  Because it was totally intentional.

But we definitely stayed on for more than two seconds.  I really need someone to time me.

Anyway, last night I got on the same bull with one of Steph’s friends (finally got to see her, yay), who ended up being kind of a jerk, and I discovered something important about that bull…

It’s not made for a male and female to ride it…  Or, maybe it is, but not me and Steph’s friend.

I know two girls can ride it comfortably and clearly one person can ride it comfortably.  But I’m not sure a guy and girl can ride it together.  Maybe if they know each other better…

Anyway, we left the bar and I immediately started to feel a stabbing pain in my leg.

We got back to Blake and Cameron’s and I whined about my leg.  So Cameron offered me some corn.  “It’s probably bruising” he told me “and there’s not much else you can do besides ice it.”  So I iced it.  It didn’t feel better.  He offered me peas, and that’s about it.

Once I got myself home, I was able to look at the damage.  All up and down my legs were rows of bruises.

I have vowed to no longer ride a mechanical bull with men.

But, next time I do ride it, I’ll have someone time me.  Then I’ll know exactly what longer than “two seconds” is.

A Thought About Something That’s Both Awesome and Terrifying

Sometimes I look up things on Craigslist…  I don’t spend an unnatural, or even regular, amount of time on it by any means, but it’s fun to look at sometimes.

Like Missed Connections?  Missed Connections is awesome(ly hilarious? Sometimes…) and I always secretly hope one will be about me (it won’t).  Also I like to look at the furniture and cars on sale because someday…  Someday I will need new furniture and a car…  Well, a car sooner rather than later.

So I was looking at jobs on Craigslist.  I don’t really take 70% of them seriously, but there’s always a few that sound cool, but don’t work in my schedule.

This time, though, I found an advertisement for egg donation.

Would I like to make $7000?  Absolutely.  That’s awesome.

Would I like to donate my eggs?  Well, therein lies the terrifying (and tricky) part.

Will donating eggs now really decrease my chances of getting pregnant later?  Well, I’m not planning on getting pregnant any time soon and I’m pretty sure they take the eggs I lose every month anyway, right?  I guess it depends on if they’re harvesting my future eggs or not, I suppose…

Would I like to have an invasive surgery?  No, not really.  Not at all, actually.  I am terrified of doctors and dentists and everything.  I go to the dentist every six months, though.  I avoid doctors like the plague.  I hate being sick.  I hate being poked and prodded.  I really hate surgery (really, really hate it–if you’re new here, you missed me complaining about that back in August/September…  Yeah, Keith suggested I make this blog to stave off boredom, which it has done since then, thankfully).  Doctors are terrifying.  Unnecessary surgery seems terrifyingly ridiculous.

So, do I want to get paid to have surgery?  It’s better than paying for surgery, but still, probably not.

But I do like the prospect of $7000.

Realistically, though, I’m probably fifteen pounds lighter for my height than any company would like.  And, also realistically, suddenly gaining fifteen pounds isn’t healthy for me (vanity aside).  So this is probably a moot thing to call awesome and/or terrifying.

I sent this to Bree and Steph, and I still think it’s true:  “Being a sperm donor must be so fricken easy.”  (You probably make a lot less, I have no idea, but there is no surgery involved which is a-okay with me.)

 

As an aside, since today is Thursday, go check out Diary of a Woo Girl where a restaurant review is posted.  Woo!

A secondary aside, do you like my use of “fricken” up there?  I don’t know if you’ve all noticed, but I don’t really swear unless I am very angry.  I know you’re probably thinking “but in the Montreal story, you swear all the time!!” And you’re right, to an extent.  But that’s usually a quote (such as Shawn’s swearing when he burned his hand) or the appropriate way to describe something (the game “fuck the dealer” or the term “gave him shit”, for instance).  Anyway, thought you all would enjoy that aside.

As for blogging, I’ve been working on content for a post about Mardi Gras costumes (you knew it was coming) as well as a new Social Mathematics post about boyfriends.  Hooray!

March Resolution Check In

So it’s the first day of March 2011…  Time to check in on our resolutions/Bucket Lists again!

Here is the numbered list I made back on January first:1.  Travel:  There hasn’t been any new travel since January, but talks of Vegas, Wyoming, Utah, and Arizona have come up.  There’s Pennsylvania over the summer too.

2.  Get an apartment:  The job part of  this is weighing me down, but I am getting more regular hours and may have found some additional temporary work.

3.  Get a car.  (See above)

4.  Keep blogging:  As of today, March first, this is my 185th post.  And today is the launch of my second blog!  But, more on that later.

Notes from last time:

Every time the weather warms up, I open, so no outdoor activities for me just yet…

As far as visiting the alma mater, I am five for seven.
And from 24 by 24 (I’ll only list the ones with some headway that haven’t been mentioned above):

7.  Learn to cook. Bree and I made pasta the other day.  I was on salad duty.

8.  Take the GRE and score in at least the 95th percentile. I’ve been taking practice tests.

14.  Be a trivia champion at least five times. I played beergo and looked up some trivia companies.

15.  Go on local brew tours. I’ve gotten some friends in on this.  It will happen soon.

22.  Embrace being a woo girl. As I said before, I would comment on this.  And…  You can visit my new blog Diary of a Woo Girl!!!  You’ll recognize it from the tiny cowboy hat.  Woo!

Anyway, we’ll check on this Bucket list in April again.  I hope everyone else is keeping up with their bucket lists!

The Ultimate Bucket List Sweep

So, I was talking to Steph today because she just got back from visiting Arizona and I sent her an adorable picture of Blake, Cameron, and I in which I may or may not have flashed a gangster peace sign and did a duck face….

I totally did a duck face.

Admittedly, I only do the duck face when I’m sending stupid picture messages to my friends, otherwise a duck face on my face will never see the light of day.

But anyway, I sent her that picture with the tag line “We miss you!!” because we all pretty much hang out every weekend these days and she was not there this past weekend, so missing her was completely valid.

Fun fact:  I hung out with six engineers, an engineering girlfriend, and my sometimes nerdy (more than me, less than all of those engineers) friend Seth this weekend.  I’m always the least nerdy, but it was painfully obvious this time…  Because there were more people/engineers (the words are pretty interchangeable in this case).

Anyway, Steph and I started talking about my bucket list and how Blake has been making fun of it because he has been a whiny, mopey butthead as of late and apparently I am the prime target for his backlash.

I really didn’t call him a sexless innkeeper, but I should have!  (I have been watching too much HIMYM recently…)

Anyway, Steph went over my bucket list and said it was fairly awesome (I agree).

And then we hatched the ultimate bucket list sweep.

A road trip (#10) to Vegas (#18) where we do something in Utah and Nevada (2/4 on #2… also we are going to Vegas, so I don’t see how we wouldn’t do something in Nevada, but I digress…)!  One of my friends also suggested looping back through Arizona and New Mexico, but that sounds like a two week excursion…

Okay, I just googled it (I do a lot of googling, you all just don’t see it) and it only takes half a day (give or take) to get to Vegas.  Why have we not done this?

I am in full support of the bucket list sweep.  Vegas or bust!  (Steph would rather fly though, because she is not as hardcore as I am.)

The Air Hockey Champions

So, yesterday, I was talking about my weekend and I mentioned that Steph and I once ran into some air hockey champions.

Or at least, they claimed to be air hockey champions.

One night early into 2009 and the second semester of our junior year, Steph and I were having a long island night around the bars and we ended up at our favorite bar enjoying long islands on special.

Maybe twenty minutes into being at that bar, we started talking to some guys from the midwest.  They had moved here recently and were about to head off to an air hockey championship in maybe Texas or something (I really don’t remember, sorry).

Steph and I both questioned this whole exchange.  Air hockey champions?  Is there such a thing as an air hockey championship?

We agreed to play air hockey with them, though.  Air hockey ranks among the cheesy things in life and cheesy, free things are some of my favorites.  They also provided us with more long islands.

So we split off into two teams:  one air hockey champion with each of us.

My team ended up winning.  I also ended up finishing one of Steph’s drinks.

The air hockey champions wanted us to continue hanging out with them after the bars closed, but Steph and I caught a ride back to my house and she ended up spending the night with me.  It was kind of a hard night in the end.

We never heard from the air hockey champions again…  Who knows how their championship went.

Girls (and guys) I’m Positive!…

So I thought you all might like an update on my weekend.

I ended up not seeing Steph, which was unfortunate.  I was with Blake still, though, because we were all hanging out in the first place to be wing women as I tried to set Blake up with Stacey.

Without Steph, we were down to three, but in a strange turn of events, Blake and one of his roommates, Cameron, came to grab me.  So, somehow, Cameron ended up coming with us for the entire night.

I did give him a top ten list of reasons to come, but I doubt they were that convincing:

1. Steph is super awesome.
2. I am super awesome.
3. Blake is your roommate and he is super awesome.
4. The three of us have tons of fun.
5. My little, Stacey, is coming with us and she is pretty fabulous.
6. We’re setting Blake up with Stacey and he needs our support.
7. If it doesn’t go well, you can watch Blake crash. (This was only after Cameron said he didn’t want to give Blake his support.)
8. All work and no play is the leading killer of wives and children in Estes Park, CO.  (Anyone get the movie reference, because the boys did not.)
9. We’re going to have a fish bowl, get excited!
10. You’re already out with us right now, so why ruin a good thing?

I ran out of ideas near the end of that list, unfortunately.  And, as I mentioned above, Steph ended up not coming with us.

I didn’t get hit on, since we were even, but we played a fun game of air hockey (not as fun as the night Steph and I met some air hockey champions, though).

I tried my best to matchmaker, but Stacey just wasn’t that into Blake, unfortunately for him.  He was kind of disappointed.  I did have fun with Cameron, though, so that was interesting.

He ended up making me breakfast (yummy) and it sounded like he would be hanging out with us more often.  So, at the very least, maybe next time I won’t have to give him a top ten list.

Also, by stepping out in my signature color (though not weather appropriate), I was feeling more like myself (even though I almost fell and I smacked a waiter, sorry waiter!)

So, as a bonus, have another Legally Blonde song that instantly makes you happy!

Place Your Bets in Vegas

So I have a talent that’s fairly impressive.

I can predict the winner of sporting events.  I know, it’s pretty fantastic.

If I am watching a sporting event on tv, for instance, and have no real attachment to the team playing, the one I decide to root for always wins.

I apologize to the Saints fans, I’m a supporter, so when I watched the game in Montreal and they played the Seahawks, it was a tossup as to who would win.  Sorry Saints.  It’s not always guaranteed when I’m a supporter.

I’ll also apologize to the Bears and Eagles for this reason.  You can’t like Green Bay and be from Colorado.  It’s basically against the law.  And since I followed this rule and stood by Steph and Shawn’s pick, respectively, a win wasn’t guaranteed.

But, if I end up without a bias, I can always predict the winner.

I can also predict the winner if I am actually at the game.  I have never been to a Nuggets, Avalanche, Broncos, Rockies, etcetera game where the hometown team lost.  It’s never happened.

The alma mater is a bit different, but I think that may be because I am so heavily invested in them winning.  The line between sense and devotion is a bit blurred.

So, I’m rooting for the Steelers to win tonight against Green Bay.  Will they win?  Time will tell…

Injury in the Mountains

I went to the mountains with Shawn once last summer.  We went on a pretty hike in the foothills.  It’s a very pretty rock formation overlooking the entire area.  It’s so scenic and gorgeous.

Our hike was all well and good until we were on our way back.  About halfway down the foothills, I slipped on some loose gravel and cut up my entire right knee.

The first thing I did was sit down because blood scares me and I was hyperventilating a bit.

Shawn sat with me for about ten minutes while I repeatedly silently told myself not to cry because I still don’t really like crying in front of other people, and especially men.

But it was getting later, so he finally stood up and told me “I don’t want to stay on the mountain all night and I know you don’t either.  So, you’re going to have to get up eventually.”

“I can’t get up,”  I protested.

“You’re  going to have to get up.  I can’t carry you down the mountain.”

“But it hurts…”  I tried my best to keep my sniffles tiny.  “I can’t walk…”

Shawn leaned down.  “I know it hurts, but you’ll have to get up so we can get back before dark.”

“Shawn…”  Another tiny sniffle.

Shawn put his hands in his pockets.  “I can’t carry you and I want to go home.  So it looks like if you’re not coming with me,  I’ll have to leave you here…”

I got up slowly and laboriously and prodded toward him, “Shawn!”

He pulled me closer to him and gave me a hug, “Look, you can walk.  I knew you could.”

Shawn ended up letting me walk in front of him.  It took us about an hour and a half to get down the rest of the mountain, but we made it, slowly.  When we got back to the trails below the cliffs, we walked together.  I was feeling kind of faint at this point, so I was holding on to Shawn.  He patted my back and kept our pace steady, but comfortable.

When we got back to his house, he helped me bandage my knee up after I cleaned it.

My knee healed mostly, eventually, but now it’s all scar tissue.  It hurts when the weather gets bad and things like paddle boats, for instance, are pretty hard for me to handle.  I can run and use ellipticals, though, so who really knows.

Anyway, last weekend Steph, our friend Blake, and I climbed up the same mountain Shawn and I had hiked this summer.  It was worse because the trail was snowy and icy at parts.  Both of them slipped: Steph once and Blake twice.  I actually ended up making it down without falling, which was my goal.  I dream big.

When we got down, I sent a message to Shawn that told him I made it up and down without injury.  He responded with “Nice.  I knew you could.”  So sweet.

Checking in on Our Resolutions

So yesterday was the first day of February and a month in to 2011.  It’s probably time to check on our resolutions.

Or our Bucket List priorities.

Here was the numbered list I made back on January first:

1.  Travel:  I already made my way to New York and Montreal.  I also had a layover in Atlanta, but that doesn’t really count.  And Pennsylvania is definitely still planned for this summer.  I don’t have anything right now, but Steph and I have been talking about Vegas.

2.  Get an apartment:  Right now I’m working on the job part of this goal.

3.  Get a car.  (See above)

4.  Keep blogging:  It’s February second right now and here’s my one hundred and fifty-ninth post on my blog.  Taa-da!!!

 

When the weather warms up a bit (or at least the snow has melted and it’s not really as slushy), I want to start up a running regiment again.  I also think I need to start playing tennis with Amy again.

 

Also Steph decided that I need to make it my goal to visit her at the alma mater every weekend this semester before she starts commuting next year.  So far, I’m three for three.

Anyway, we’ll check on this Bucket list in March again.  I hope everyone else is keeping up with their bucket lists!

Counterproductive Success

I like to talk about social quotients and social laws of proportionality sometimes here at Help!   I’m Post-Grad.  I haven’t thought of a good name for these as a whole…  But maybe something like “social mathematics” would be an appropriate term?  Social statistics?  I don’t really ever go into stats for anyone, so I don’t know if statistics are an apt description.  I think social mathematics is a good way to describes these things.

Anyway, today is another social mathematics day.  We’ll be discussing counterproductive success.

Steph is the perfect example of counterproductive success.  At any given time in her life, she is unable to be successful on all fronts.  She either is successful in her academic/professional life or she is successful in her personal life.

Steph is very focused on school and career, but during the last few months of 2010, she was in Arizona with Cam.  Now that she’s back in grad school at the alma mater, she is now a good sixteen hour drive from Cam.  This is a bigger picture version, but small things happen in similar instances.  Such as when she was applying for grad schools, she and Cam had a huge fight.  Things like this happen all the time.  I’m curious,  but terrified, to see what happens when Cam eventually proposes…  It’s the way the universe seems to work in this case.

Bree has a similar version of counterproductive success

I don’t really fall under counterproductive success scales, unfortunately.  I don’t know what it is about me, but I’m pretty much an all or nothing kind of girl.  Either everything is amazing or everything is horrible.  I don’t get that nice compromise.  I’m kind of jealous, actually.

What I do get, though, is that whenever I’m either all up or all down, someone else I know is in the exact opposite situation.

There are those people who seem to have their lives completely together and may or may not be ignoring the “personal” aspect, which is probably why their life is all “completely together,” since they’re ignoring half of the total package.  Most of these people are men, so I’m ignoring that, because I’ve been discussing male behavior with Steph and Bree lately and I think it falls into a completely different social mathematics category.  Next time.

I’m pretty sure that ninety percent of the time, counterproductive success only applies to women anyway.  So there’s that too.

But I digress.

Take for instance, Larissa.  Right now we’re on opposite ends of the spectrum.  I’m basically all down and she’s basically all up.  I don’t know how though, and that’s what bothers me.  I think a lot of it is luck, honestly.  But this is the “grass is greener” subtext of counterproductive success.  Some people make things look easy.

I’ve been the one who makes it look easy before, so I don’t really know.

But, I guess the nice thing is that everything looks up eventually.  So I’m putting in the effort now, to be up flawlessly later.

I think that even in this case, success isn’t really just spontaneous, so it does take a lot of hard work.  Except with Larissa right now…  I really think this is all luck or the planets aligning.  I don’t even know.  She seems to be on a lucky streak right now and I am just at a loss.